Fighting the Fear

“Deep breathing, focus on your breath,” Aaron thought to himself. His breaths were quick and his pulse raced as he struggled to get his feelings under control. Campbell stood by, pretending he couldn’t feel that Aaron was having another freak-out. As more people exited the tram, he quietly turned to Aaron.

“Are you okay?” Campbell knew it was a dumb question, but he also knew the response he’d get. Aaron was silent for a moment.

“Yes…” he replied in a strained whisper.

“That’s cool,” Campbell nodded, “even though you’re broadcasting your anxiety to me… And probably some people on the tram.”

“Oh…” Aaron looked down. It hadn’t been the first time he’d gotten such feedback.

“You are literally wigging me out,” he remembered Miche saying a few days ago. His smart-ass response just made her cock an eyebrow and keep eating her lunch.

“It’s been four months. I think—“ Campbell stopped in his tracks when he saw the pained expression on Aaron’s face. “I’m sorry. I forget.”

It took a while for Aaron to shake the frustration and give a response. “It’s… It’s okay. I know you don’t always understand. It gets harder to shake though.” Aaron looked out the window of the tram, a swarm of emotions blocking his ability to think. The view was beautiful and he was grateful to be going on vacation, especially after months of fighting people from the future. Yet, part of him could not disengage from his growing anxiety. He and his friends had ended the threat, but his body had seemingly never stopped feeling a sense of danger. He stood silent, struggling to understand how he could feel so defeated after a victory.

“Stop trying to read my mind,” Campbell shook his head.

“Habit.” Aaron shrugged, forcing a laugh.

“Please.” Campbell was blunt. “We both know you never do that.”

“Well, that’s a lot easier than saying…” Aaron pushed himself to find the words. “Than saying I don’t know what to do.” He turned to face Campbell, confused. “I study how to help people. I can read people’s minds! But I can’t even help myself…”

“If you can survive people trying to kill you, I don’t think that’s true,” Campbell embraced him and kissed his forehead. Aaron leaned into his body. He was vulnerable, raw, and open. It made him feel weak, but he remembered what he learned when he discovered Campbell’s powers: He can’t always be the one protecting the people he loved. Aaron had come to understand that just as much as he wanted to save people, he still needed his friends.

“This is a long ass tram ride,” Aaron gave a genuine smile, which almost felt foreign to him.

“Why aren’t we at our gate yet?” Campbell looked down, chuckling. Aaron started a laugh until something struck him.

“No…” he broke away from Campbell. There were just a few people left on the tram. Many of them had gotten off on the previous stop, but one that had gotten on seemed strange to him. He took note of the doors and picked up errant thoughts. He felt strangers’ panic as they realized the tram had passed yet again, their confusion as to why they weren’t moving quickly to their gates.

“Not now. Please.” Aaron shook his head at a young man. He was dressed in dark clothes and his face was obscured with his hood. As the young man opened his arms and hands, Aaron felt an odd sensation. His hands were tingling as the man’s began to glow. Before the man could act, he slammed him against the wall of the tram with his telekinesis.

“Why are you…?!” Aaron shouted at him, then paused. “Trying to kill me…” he thought to himself. “Why are you here?” he tried to calm himself down. The young man only smiled, pushing his arms against the force of Aaron’s psychic powers and creating a glowing ball of energy. Aaron froze, his eyes wide.

“No!” Campbell yelled, creating a wall of blue energy to envelop the ball and protect the passengers. He didn’t have to struggle to maintain the shield as the ball exploded. As the months had passed, he had gained a sense of mastery over his powers. He did fear, though, the effect this battle would have on Aaron.

“You’re why the tram hasn’t stopped,” Campbell stepped forward, allowing Aaron to catch his breath.

“You’re right,” the young man replied. “I didn’t think the plan would be this hard to execute. I also didn’t think there were any supers here…” He looked up and tapped his chin. “No matter,” he smiled. “Yours don’t seem to be as powerful as ours.”

“The hell?” Aaron was slowly becoming battle-ready. He and Campbell moved into a fighting stance as the young man launched two more energy balls at them. Aaron reflexively pushed them back, leading Campbell to trap them in two smaller walls as he did before.

“Aaron? Are you-“ Campbell tried to communicate with Aaron through his thoughts, but they shifted in Aaron’s mind. He knew Aaron had taken a break from fighting, but he could tell that last move wasn’t inspired by strategy. It was done through fear.

“…My powers…” Aaron looked down. “They’re…” Campbell blocked another energy ball from hitting Aaron.

“We can talk about it later,” Campbell reassured him. “Do what you can.” He gave the young man a stern look. “What are you trying to pull?”

“Well…” The young man shuffled his feet. “I’m trying to blow this place up!”

“Can you even make a ball that large?” Campbell asked.

“Silly. It’s not about the size of the bomb, but the amount of energy I can allow one to expel at any given moment. See those bright lights?” He pointed to the balls of energy outside the tram and the building. “I’m almost done setting them. They’ll each pack a punch strong enough to level this entire airport. Starting by the chain reaction set by…” he closed his eyes and a mass of energy the size of a basketball materialized in the center of the tram. “This one!”

“Can you wall that one?” Aaron sent a telepathic message to Campbell. He focused his energies to make sure they could stay in contact.

“I’m… Not sure. I didn’t do well in physics. Or chemistry. Or…” Campbell’s thoughts began to run.

“This is why I don’t worry about the science. I have telekinesis. I mean, all bets are off,” they both shared a laugh, eliciting confusion from their resident bomb-maker. They both appreciated the levity, but knew they had to quickly solve this problem.

“While you two do…” The man looked back and forth between Aaron and Campbell, “whatever the hell you’re doing. I’m going to blow up an airport, some planes, and some unfortunate people.”

Time seemed to freeze as Aaron and Campbell both turned to him, wide-eyed. Aaron could intimately feel the changes in energy of the floating ball, as though he had some measure of control. He could feel the man’s thoughts as he prepared to detonate the ball of energy, and Campbell’s fear about their success. He gave one look at Campbell then, as though on instinct, Aaron extended his arms and cupped his hands toward the ball. A small blue bubble formed around it.

“Aaron…?” Campbell was astounded. Near the end of the tram, the young man grew furious and impatient.

“Enough.” He voice was flat, serious. The ball began to have a violent glow, leading people to cover their eyes. Aaron reacted by trying his best to suppress the expansion of energy, using his telekinesis to keep the molecules captive. Campbell rushed behind him, putting his arms over Aaron and holding his hands. Together, they were able to create a shield that seemed to have the capabilities of Campbell’s stalwart shields, but the force of Aaron’s psychic abilities. Aaron’s mind didn’t waver as he connected with Campbell to hinder the bomb’s explosion, managing to inhibit the expansion of atoms. As their minds and bodies grew more weary at the effort, the bomb subsided and soon became a small, shining ember in the tram.

“What?!” The young man raged. “NO ONE is able to suppress my bombs!”

“Yeah,” Aaron scowled at him. “Why don’t you quit fucking things up for me?” He deftly punched the man in the jaw, sending him reeling into the floor. Before he had a moment to respond, Aaron incapacitated him with a psychic wave. He could only briefly celebrate his victory before he fell backward, nearly losing consciousness. Campbell caught him before he could completely fall.

“You’re exerting yourself too much,” he raised Aaron’s body.

“Please. I’ve fought people who could manipulate psychic energy. I think I’m good,” Aaron gave a weak smile. “What do we do with…” He pointed to where the fainted man’s body previously was. “Damnit! Not this again…” He had had enough of beating people up and them disappearing.

“Do you think it’s…” Aaron slowly supported himself.

“If it was, you’d know,” Campbell helped steady him.

“I’m not so sure…” Aaron looked away. “My powers have been fluctuating lately, and I’m not sure why. Even today…” He looked back to Campbell’s concerned face. “Things could have gone differently.”

“But they didn’t. And they haven’t before. Always remember that,” he leaned down to kiss Aaron as the tram finally stopped. “But we may have to walk quite a bit to catch our plane.”

“I really don’t care. I want off this thing. If nothing else, I’ll make people halt the plane for us. And give us first class seats,” Aaron joked, grabbing his bags.

“Abuse of power,” Campbell was grateful to have such a jovial conversation with his boyfriend. Such exchanges had seemed starkly absent from their lives for the past few weeks.

“Do you want free headphones or not?” Aaron could feel a long dormant part of himself resurfacing. If he was facing a new threat, he couldn’t keep himself inhibited by his anxiety. With Campbell’s help, he felt as though he could finally get back to himself. Though he regretted how his fears had affected him over the past four months, he had hope that he could rise to the occasion and do his friends the justice they had in protecting his life.